Lauren Duncan
Blog #4
Conflict Styles in Romantic Comedies
Conflict in an inevitable part of life, and we
have developed various forms of conflict styles to help us reach resolutions.
One of the conflict styles that I find most interesting is the “competing”
style. Dale Eilerman states, “The strategy of competing as a means of gaining
power and control stems from early
childhood and is reinforced throughout our years in school and college”. When
reflecting on a romantic comedy that represented conflict styles well, I chose
to analyze the movie “How to Lose a Guy
in 10 Days”. In this movie, a very successful advertising executive, better
known as the infamous Matthew McConaughey, makes a bet with his buddies that he
can make a woman fall in love with him in 10 short days. With the little
information I have provided above regarding this movie, it is an obvious
observation that McConaughey’s character is using a “competing” style of
conflict with the woman he is to make fall in love with him. He later meets
Kate Hudson in a bar and decides this is the woman he is going to pursue and
make fall for him. The value of his own goals in this scenario are very high,
however the value of the relationship between him and Kate are found to be
exceptionally low. Ultimately, his goal falls under the “I win, you lose”
category as he is primarily concerned with proving his buddies wrong and
winning this bet. A competitive style is an attempt to gain power and pressure
a change at the other person’s expense, which is exactly what we see taking
place between McConaughey and Hudson. He is willing to do almost anything to
make her fall in love with him. For example, he buys her extravagant diamonds,
takes her to important events that involve his workplace, and he even takes her
home to meet his family at one point in the movie. As you can imagine, Hudson
begins to fall for this man and soon realizes that she is apart of a bet, not a
true love story. In realizing this, she begins to create her own competitive
style by pushing him away in any way possible. She embarrasses him in front of
his friends, buys a dog that he hates, and begins to act incredibly clingy and
immature. It can be said that she takes on the “forcing” role by slamming doors
and often giving McConaughey the silent treatment. Just like we see in this
movie, we can use conflict styles to make conflict situations better, or
perhaps worse.
Works Cited
"The Use and Misuse of a Competing Style in Conflict Management." The Use and Misuse of a Competing Style in Conflict Management. N.p., n.d. Web. 06 Mar. 2016.
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